


there's no doubt when i'm with you

by albypotter



Category: Harry Potter and the Cursed Child - Thorne & Rowling
Genre: Christmas, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:41:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21946003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/albypotter/pseuds/albypotter
Summary: “It’s okay, Albus,” Scorpius says, his smile gentle and almost apologetic, but Albus can tell that it’s awfully sad underneath. “It’s not so bad here at Christmas, from what I’ve heard. And it’s not like I’ll be all alone.”“No,” Albus says, and he’s surprised by the determination in his own voice. “If you’re not going home for Christmas, then neither am I.”
Relationships: Scorpius Malfoy/Albus Severus Potter
Comments: 8
Kudos: 142





	there's no doubt when i'm with you

**Author's Note:**

> hi so this was *supposed* to be for hogwartsonline's holiday OWLs, i didn't finish it in time but here it is anyway! the prompt was “If you’re not going home for Christmas, neither am I.”

They’re getting close to the end of term now, but their new Potions professor is still setting daily homework. Albus would complain, but it gives him an excuse to spread himself out over Scorpius’ bed so they can share a textbook as they work. It’s a little tight; the beds in the Slytherin dorm really weren’t made to fit two teenage boys at once, but they’ve been doing it for a few years already, and neither of them want to stop. It’s nice to be able to be this close to someone, Albus thinks. Only, there’s something off about Scorpius’ bed today compared to his own, which is for once neat and cleared of all his possessions. It takes him a while to work out what it is.

“Hey, Scorpius?”

“Hm?” Scorpius lifts his head up from where he was poring over his half-finished essay. His hair is sticking up on one side from where he’s been distractedly running his hand through it, and it’s unfairly adorable. Albus pushes the thought away.

“Why aren’t you packed yet? You know we’re going home on Saturday, right?”

Scorpius runs a hand through his hair, fluffing it up again, and Albus resists the urge to reach over and smooth it down for him. Scorpius is so close, it would be so easy. But he knows he can’t; it’s too intimate a gesture for a boy who’s _just_ his friend, and he doesn’t want to face those feelings quite yet.

“Oh. Um.” Albus recognises Scorpius’ _worried_ face, with the hard crease between his eyebrows and the gentle frown of his mouth, and there’s a little pang of sadness in his chest. He reaches out to put his hand over Scorpius’ where it’s lying on the bedsheets and links their fingers together; it’s something he does a lot, when he can tell Scorpius is struggling. Some people think it’s strange, but it doesn’t bother Albus. There are stranger things to do with your best friend. Probably.

“Hey,” Albus says again, more gently. “What’s up?”

It could be any number of things, with Scorpius. He worries about everything. But this feels big. Scorpius mumbles something that Albus doesn’t catch and moves to close his textbook and put his notes away.

“Scorpius.”

Scorpius looks up at him with sad, scared eyes, and Albus stares back, not ready to back down yet.

“It’s not a big deal or anything,” Scorpius says finally, words slow and reluctant. “It’s just… I’m staying here for the holidays. My dad is going to visit my grandparents, and he asked me to stay, so…”

“Why didn’t you tell me before? You could’ve come with us to Bulgaria–“ Albus cuts himself off, running through the logistics in his mind to try and work out whether there’s space for one more in the cabin they’ve hired for the family. But they’re already crammed into a few tiny rooms…

“It’s okay, Albus,” Scorpius says, his smile gentle and almost apologetic, but Albus can tell that it’s awfully sad underneath. “It’s not so bad here at Christmas, from what I’ve heard. And it’s not like I’ll be all alone, I’m sure there are others staying too.”

“No,” Albus says, and he’s surprised by the determination in his own voice. “If you’re not going home for Christmas, then neither am I.”

“Albus, you _can’t_ –“ Scorpius starts, but Albus holds up a hand to cut him off.

“I’m staying, Scorpius. I’m not going to leave you here all by yourself. It’s _Christmas_. No one should be alone on Christmas.” _Especially not you_ , he adds in his head. He knows that Scorpius’ grief is ever-present, but it always seems worse around the holidays. The way he grows quieter and more subdued every year as the end of term draws near never escapes Albus’ notice. No, he has to stay. For Scorpius.

“Al, really, it’s okay. I don’t mind. I won’t make you miss out on a holiday with your family just for me.” It’s funny, how Scorpius still hasn’t realised that Albus would give up anything for him. Albus hasn’t managed to get that through to him in all their years of friendship, but there’s no harm in trying again now.

“Listen,” he says, and shifts in the bed so that he’s close enough to take both of Scorpius’ hands in his. Scorpius looks up at him through wide eyes, and his lips are slightly parted and stunningly pink and it’s all Albus can do not to kiss him senseless then and there. But he knows he can’t. So he focuses instead on the way Scorpius’ hands are shaking as he holds them.

“I’m staying, okay? Don’t fight it.”

“Okay,” Scorpius says, and it’s cracked and a little broken, but Albus wants to believe him anyway.

* * *

Spending the winter holidays at Hogwarts is bizarre. Albus is used to Christmas being one big family event spread out over the last weeks of December, and the empty castle feels hollow and wrong in comparison. It’s okay, though, because he has Scorpius, and that’s all he’s ever needed.

The whole of Slytherin house has left, so they have the dorm and the common room entirely to themselves. Despite all the vacant space, Albus finds that Scorpius is closer to him than ever. They have the whole length of the Slytherin table in the great hall to sit at, but Scorpius is always so close that their knees touch under the table. They spend lazy afternoons curled up on the squashy common room sofas together, limbs entangled, reading or talking or finishing the homework that Scorpius insists they can’t just leave until the last minute. Sometimes Scorpius leans over to rest his head on Albus’ shoulder, and it sends a chill over Albus’ skin every time. Being able to spend this time with Scorpius – just the two of them alone – evokes a strange feeling that might be fear or joy, or possibly both. Usually the glow in his chest when Scorpius looks at him is diluted somewhat by the presence of others, but now he feels saturated, full up, as though the boy in front of him is the only real thing he’s ever known. It hurts, being so close to Scorpius all the time with nothing else to distract him from how beautiful his best friend is, but he can’t do anything about it. There’s nothing Albus would _want_ to do, anyway. This is enough, he tells himself, often enough that he can pretend he believes it.

* * *

It’s getting late, and they need to go to sleep, but Scorpius is still stretched out over Albus’ bed. And Albus doesn’t mind, not exactly, because being free to watch Scorpius reading a book in his star patterned pyjamas, hair soft and messy from where he’s been constantly running his hands through it, is glorious. He looks almost like an angel, the soft, warm light of the candle by his bedside lighting up his pale hair so that it glows gold like a halo. Albus thinks that he could watch Scorpius like this for the rest of his life and never get tired of the sight. Scorpius scrunches up his face as he yawns again, and it’s strangely sweet, but it makes Albus realise just how exhausted he is. He can’t bring himself to ask Scorpius to go, though; he looks so soft, so happy and comfortable here that Albus’ chest hurts with love just looking at him.

He lies down next to Scorpius. It’s nice to be able to be this close to him, even if he knows that he’ll probably move away in a minute. Albus savours the feeling of Scorpius’ body heat that radiates across the tiny space between them. Scorpius looks up from his book and runs a hand through his hair again. There’s a little tuft sticking up at the front now, and Albus wants so badly to smooth it out for him. Scorpius’ hair always looks so _soft_ , and he’s desperate to know what it would be like to run his hands through it, to pull Scorpius close and–

“Hey,” Scorpius says, quiet and sweet like he always is. “Going to sleep?”

“Yeah,” Albus says, reluctant, because he doesn’t want this moment to end. _He wants Scorpius to stay._

“Okay.”

Albus watches Scorpius worry his bottom lip between his teeth, and he looks nervous like he always does, but there’s something else there. Albus feels it too.

“Do you want to–“

“Can I stay here tonight?” Scorpius cuts him off, and Albus can’t help but smile at that, because it’s exactly what he was about to offer. He loves how in sync they are sometimes.

“Yes,” he breathes, and watches Scorpius relax. “Please.”

It should feel strange, Albus thinks as Scorpius puts his book down on the bedside table and closes the hangings around the bed with a quick wand movement. This is too intimate for friends to be, it should feel strange, or awkward, or uncomfortable. But when Scorpius lies back down next to him, their faces inches away from each other in the semi-darkness, it doesn’t feel anything but _right_.

“G’night, Al,” Scorpius murmurs. His eyes are fluttering closed already, long, pale lashes casting their little shadows over his cheeks, and he looks so beautiful, Albus can barely breathe at the sight of him.

“Goodnight,” he says, and tries not to think about the way his voice cracks even on that one little word. If Scorpius only knew the effect he had on him…

Albus always takes forever to fall asleep; there’s too much to think about in the dark, too many things going on in his mind for him to push them all away. But tonight, with Scorpius, their legs tangled together between the sheets and Scorpius’ hand curled around his forearm, it’s calmer than he’s ever felt. It seems almost a waste to fall asleep, when Scorpius is so close to him, so peaceful and unguarded, but it’s too easy. Albus sinks into sleep and dreams of infinite moments just like this one.

* * *

He wakes up in a panic in the early morning; there’s something _moving_ in his bed. But, of course, it’s just Scorpius. Scorpius, his body pressed against Albus’, looking up at him with something like wonder.

”Morning,” Albus says. Scorpius shifts again, and it shocks Albus’ whole body. They’re _so close,_ here in bed together. Scorpius doesn’t seem to notice.

“Hey... you look so pretty right now, Al,” he mumbles, though his eyes are half-closed still. His voice is heavy with sleep.

“You always look pretty,” Albus replies before he can think, before he can realise what’s been said, and watches Scorpius’ mouth twitch into a tiny smile. He should feel embarrassed, he should be horrified that he’s admitting the secret he’s tried so hard to keep for the last few months, but all he feels is _safe_. Warm and safe and loved.

Scorpius is unfazed, because of course he is. He stretches an arm around Albus to pull him even closer, if that’s possible, and goes straight back to sleep with his head tucked into the side of Albus’ neck. Tiny breaths ghost Albus’ skin and make him shiver. Maybe they’ll talk about this properly when Scorpius wakes up again, but until then, Albus is happy to just hold him close. This is where they both feel safest, after all. Wrapped up in each other.

**Author's Note:**

> merry christmas!!


End file.
